Film Review: Jeepers Creepers (2001)

Also known as: Here Comes the Boogeyman (working title)
Release Date: July, 2001 (Fantasia International Film Festival)
Directed by: Victor Salva
Written by: Victor Salva
Music by: Bennett Salvay
Cast: Gina Philips, Justin Long, Jonathan Breck, Eileen Brennan

American Zoetrope, United Artists, 91 Minutes

Review:

“She did lose her head that night, Trish, and you wanna know what he did for her? He sewed it back on.” – Darry

I saw Jeepers Creepers way back when it first came out on DVD. I didn’t see it in the theater because it looked shitty. I was right. But checking it out with a bunch of friends that wanted to see how bad it was, was a pretty worthwhile experience. I hadn’t watched it since but I wanted to see if it was just as bad as I remembered. Well… it’s worse.

At the time, I had no idea who Justin Long was. In this film, I just saw him as a super effeminate pansy with a rose tattoo around his belly button and with the line delivery of an identity confused millennial. While this isn’t exactly how he would act in films after this one, I’d assume he was directed to play the character this way, he was certainly committed to being one of the most annoying scream queens with a penis that I have ever seen. But when I get into more on the director, further into this review, this will make more sense.

Gina Philips wasn’t as annoying as Justin Long but I didn’t like her either. And what sucks the most is that this entire picture rode on the shoulders of just Philips and Long. Two characters. This is a fucking horror movie! If there are only two characters, that’s not a lot of targets for the monster. Sure, random people get mauled, here and there, but they are characters you only know for like two seconds and then they are ripped to pieces, usually off screen, mind you. Horror movies where teens fight a monster need at least five teens. The more the merrier as people watch these things to see teens get stabbed, dismembered and mutilated.

The creature is somewhat original but not in anyway cool. He’s a demon in a trench coat and hat with wings that sprout out of his back when he needs to travel faster. I feel as if the demon hunting the teens is a metaphor for the director: a creeper, shitzoid, pedophile who has been tried and convicted as such… well before this movie was made.

Victor Salva, this film’s writer and director, is a sick piece of shit. In 1988, he was convicted of sexual misconduct with a twelve year-old boy on the film set of Clownhouse. He even videotaped one of the encounters and was found to be in possession of child pornography videos and magazines. He plead guilty to lewd and lascivious conduct, oral sex with a person under fourteen and procuring a child for pornography. He was sentenced to three years in prison and was released after only fifteen months served.

How the fuck does this guy still work in Hollywood? Can people change and be rehabilitated? Yes. But when it comes to something like this, sorry… I feel no sympathy. And if you think he’s changed, Justin Long’s character in this movie should raise some fucking eyebrows.

In a day and age where just an accusation of sexual misconduct towards an adult woman can get you immediately fired from your Hollywood job, how has this guy, who fucked little boys, still been able to find work? I mean, he just made Jeepers Creepers 3 last year.

The fact that all of this was known when this first Jeepers Creepers movie was made is also an eye opener on how the industry works, as this was produced by American Zoetrope, a company run by the Coppola family and founded by Francis Ford Coppola and George Lucas.

But getting back to the movie itself, it’s shit. Complete, total and utter shit.

There is no doubt about it, this must be put through the Cinespiria Shitometer. The results read, “Type 6 Stool: Fluffy pieces with ragged edges, a mushy stool.”

Rating: 2.5/10
Pairs well with: I guess Jeepers Creepers 2 and 3 but why would you want to watch this, let alone sequels?

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